Beer Goggles, First Drafts, and Tattoo Nightmares

I love it when seeming unrelated things connect like paper dolls in my mind. Beer goggles (for those too innocent to know) are what people claim to have been wearing when they've had a few drinks too many and the Star Trek fan who never caught their eye before suddenly becomes HAWT and fascinating and all sorts of kissable.

So what would beer goggles have to do with a first draft of a manuscript? Lots, my friend. Lots. Creating words and worlds, chaos and conflict—it’s intoxicating. We come up for air enamored and hazy, buzzing enough that the lines between a good start and a good manuscript get blurry and sometimes disappear.

One of my current favorite shows is Tattoo Nightmares. It’s a reality show where people with awful tattoos come to three amazing artists to get cover-ups. The backstories? Fascinating. The finished products? Mind blowing. You can hardly see traces of the botched pieces they used to have. They each leave with a masterpiece of skin art.

Being a part of a critique group keeps me from beer goggling after a first draft. I am still the artist, but discussing my manuscript with other writers helps sober me up and transform a good beginning into a work that’s ready to show others.

So how about you? Ever fall in love with an awful first draft or get a terrible tattoo? Comment and tell us about it.

Contest: Dodging Writing Questions

Holidays aren’t easy for writers. With the kids out of school, quiet time happens only during the wee hours when everyone else is ordering gift cards online or wrapping presents. And then there’s that awkward moment when we’re questioned by our REAR (Regularly Employed Anonymous Relatives). See if this sounds familiar:  

REAR: How’s your writing coming?

Me: Fine. *looks for a deviled egg and a good hiding place*

REAR: Have you finished that book you were working on?

Me: Well, the first two drafts. My critique group has it now.

REAR: You could have just sent it to me. I read Twilight last year.

Me: Uh, thanks?

REAR: So as soon as they’ve read it you’ll send it off to all the major publishing houses, right?

Me: I’m sure I’ll have more revisions to do. Then I’ll send it to some Beta readers. Then I’ll revise some more.

REAR: Huh. My neighbor has a friend whose aunt wrote her dog’s memoir. She sold copies at our class reunion. I bet I could get her to give you some pointers. She finished her book in three weeks and published it all by herself a month later.

Me: The tea is sweet, right? *hurries off & volunteers to sit at the kids’ table*

If it felt familiar, just know you are not alone. Preparing your book for publication is a long process. I’m still not sure why we’re called writers instead of revisers. So for a little fun, tell us your best topic-dodging line when you’ve given up on getting your REAR to understand and just want to change the subject. On Monday, December 5th, I’ll let my littlest pick a commenter out of a hat to win a package of Eraselets (cute little bracelets that you can also use as erasers). http://www.eraselet.com/  U.S. entries only please. J