REAR: How’s your writing coming?
Me: Fine. *looks for a deviled egg and a good hiding place*
REAR: Have you finished that book you were working on?
Me: Well, the first two drafts. My critique group has it now.
REAR: You could have just sent it to me. I read Twilight last year.
Me: Uh, thanks?
REAR: So as soon as they’ve read it you’ll send it off to all the major publishing houses, right?
Me: I’m sure I’ll have more revisions to do. Then I’ll send it to some Beta readers. Then I’ll revise some more.
REAR: Huh. My neighbor has a friend whose aunt wrote her dog’s memoir. She sold copies at our class reunion. I bet I could get her to give you some pointers. She finished her book in three weeks and published it all by herself a month later.
Me: The tea is sweet, right? *hurries off & volunteers to sit at the kids’ table*
If it felt familiar, just know you are not alone. Preparing your book for publication is a long process. I’m still not sure why we’re called writers instead of revisers. So for a little fun, tell us your best topic-dodging line when you’ve given up on getting your REAR to understand and just want to change the subject. On Monday, December 5th, I’ll let my littlest pick a commenter out of a hat to win a package of Eraselets (cute little bracelets that you can also use as erasers). http://www.eraselet.com/ U.S. entries only please. J
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